Red
by Spicy Sith
Summary: Somewhere beneath the streets of London, there was an assassin, a girl, and her laundry.


Fiction rated: M – English – humor/romance

Somewhere beneath the streets of London, there was a girl and her laundry.

**RED**

The Shadow Gallery

Regardless of how special this house was, there were still chores that demanded to be taken care of, and places that were common to any other home above. The laundry room was one of them and a young woman didn't like to run out of clean clothes to wear.

Evey Hammond looked around and was determined to stay in that room until she was done with her laundry. She wondered when and how V took care of his own laundry since she'd arrived. Actually Evey couldn't remember seeing anything even remotely related to it. Well, of course the washing machine was there, so was the dryer, the familiar brands of detergent, bleach -as if V ever wore something not dark that she knew of- softener and so on, not to mention the iron of a quality she'd never seen before but V's laundry was still missing from that scene, as if it didn't exist. She had to suppress a laugh when very silly voices in her head began an argument to determine if he wore boxers or briefs. Interestingly enough, although she was at home all the time she'd never caught V in the laundry room so maybe he did go in there only when she was asleep. That seemed reasonable except for the fact that the washing machine and the dryer weren't exactly quiet and her sleep was usually light. Perhaps he was putting something in the glass of water she drank before going to bed...

Well, -his- laundry could to be sacrosanct and oh, so mysterious but hers was right there in a pretty reed hamper, waiting for its turn in the washing machine. She began sorting out items by color, texture and so on. The little "A" cup brassier was picked to be washed separately during the soft cycle but Evey couldn't find the matching pink panties. She emptied the hamper on the floor looking for it, checked everywhere in the room and nothing; the panties simply were not there. She gasped realizing she could have forgotten them in the bathroom after her bath and ran out of the room to make sure they were not hanging somewhere, right there and in plain view for V to find. No, nothing in the bathroom either. She decided they had to be in her room and focused on loading the machines. Thirty minutes later she had already forgotten about them.

Two days later Evey opened her lingerie drawer to pick something to put on after her bath and right under the green set, she saw the missing pink panties. They were clean and neatly folded as the rest of her underwear, right under the matching pink bra, as if they'd never been apart. She would have considered it one of those harmless little things that sometimes happened, like vanishing needles, except for the fact that two days later as she loaded the washing machine, the purple panties she'd put in the hamper the previous night were also gone. "Well!" she thought "Well, indeed!" This time she was sure the panties had been -in- the hamper and by the way, V had seemed remarkably cheerful at breakfast, giggling to himself when she wasn't looking, or downright staring at her when she was. V was positively glowing.

Evey considered confronting him as soon as he was back from yet another of his nocturnal escapades but the thought of V behaving like a panty-snatcher teenage pervert was too good to spoil so she decided to say not a word and wait for a repetition of the reappearing panties miracle. In all honesty she was shocked but very amused and strangely excited; imagining what sort of things V did with/to her stolen panties was enough to have her mind racing. She had to notice as well that he didn't return them to the hamper, mixed with the next batch of laundry, which would be the simplest and most inconspicuous thing to do. No, he kept them for a couple days and then waited for her to be distracted or asleep to sneak into her room and put them in the drawer, clean and folded. She finished with the laundry, and went back to her room to put everything away and ran a quick inventory of everything in her underwear drawer just to be absolutely sure the purple panties weren't hiding in there after all and no, they weren't.

As expected, a couple days later the missing purple panties reappeared in the drawer, clean and folded just the way the pink ones before them. A grin decorated Evey's face as she decided to strike back...

Next time the hamper would contain no panties. Not the pink ones, not the purple ones, not any of the other panties V had "borrowed" for her from above. Evey decided not to put on any underwear for a while and V's mood changed just the slightest, as if he were somewhat disappointed or puzzled. Every morning he'd cook breakfast for her but there was something in his body language that betrayed some hidden discomfort. V tried to spend more time around Evey, paying a bit too much attention to everything she did and said, as if trying to unfold some amazing truth.

Evey was behaving as usual, sometimes teasing, sometimes keeping a discreet distance but cordial and well-behaved in general, and playing the brat only once or twice to keep the balance. V was growing moody by the hour, which just made Evey smile to herself. "The pervert is breaking" She thought as she casually turned the page and continued reading her book.

The now confirmed panty-snatcher sitting next to her was looking uncharacteristically restless but still pretended to focus on his book. Evey announced her wish to take a bath and V simply grunted his acknowledgement. Evey put the book on the coffee table and spent the following hour taking her bath, relaxing and reviewing her schedule for the rest of the evening. Once she was done, she put on her soft bath robe and walked straight to her room with a bundle of clothes under her arm, casually neglecting to visit to the laundry room to fill her hamper with everything she'd been wearing previous to her bath.

The Shadow Gallery seemed to be empty, lights dimmed for the night, as if V had left in yet another of his many "business" nights but all the time Evey felt watched and every corner could be hiding him. She reached her room and closed the door behind her, taking a couple minutes to make sure she was the only person there. She had to be discreet as well, this was his home and she had no way to know for certain if there were bugs in the room.

Evey brushed her hair slowly and once finished went to her violated lingerie drawer and put on a pair of new lovely red panties. She remembered V's nervousness when he gave her those panties, artificially lost in a big bag of blouses and skirts. The most important step on that stage of her plan was approaching and the very air around her seemed thicker. Her delicate fingers found a switch on the wall and in one fluid motion Evey turned the lights off and the robe she'd been wearing fell to the floor. A lithe body climbed on the bed and the mind that inhabited it got to work, creating images designed only to arouse. Evey settled over the covers and entertained herself thinking on detail on what kind of things V could be doing with her kidnapped dirty panties. Eventually her thoughts strayed to imagining what kind of things V could do to the panties while she had them on. Her hands followed the direction of the images in her mind, touching and exploring. No need to hurry, either, it was good enough by its own right. A soft warmth spread from her belly to her limbs and her skin became so sensitive that every touch made her tremble and she wondered if V was somewhere in a room she still hadn't seen, watching her and listening to her soft moans. The thought only excited her more and the progression of events demanded that her hands reached down between her legs to deliver delicious torment, all through the thin red fabric that greedily kept a good deal of moisture. Evey took her time, delaying her orgasm two, three times; to finally explode wishing V was there in the flesh to watch or even better; to join her. She smiled and slipped between the sheets, taking the panties off to put them in a small plastic bag to keep the scent intact, and fell asleep, pleased with how things were going so far.

Morning came and V wasn't home, which wasn't entirely odd considering his always changing schedule. Evey was slightly disappointed but determined to continue with hers. She spent her day cleaning up her room, watching banned cartoons V had rescued from a dusty cellar, and catching up on her reading. V had selected several books for her and insisted she read at least one chapter of each every day, previous to discussing them. Always the teacher, sometimes very annoying when he used that admonishing tone, and waved a black finger in her face…

It was after curfew that she heard the distinct sound of opening locks and although she had already changed into her sleeping oversized shirt, hurried to the main corridor to greet her host. "Good evening, V" She curtsied, an innocent smile in her face.

"Hello, Evey!" Was V's cheerful reply, adorned with the mandatory bow. One would expect the owner of that mask would be far less clean and energetic after supposedly being out for a whole night and the following day. She wouldn't be surprised in the least if he admitted to having a whole network of other places to stay at. Perhaps there were even more laundry rooms than the one she knew about, which would explain a couple things as well.

Evey had also learned that considering the characteristics of his "profession" it wasn't a good idea to ask him how his day/night had been, because sometimes he'd just tell her and she wasn't in the mood for some of the things he did. It was best to simply let her face show how much she liked to see him.

V's mood was vastly improved and after putting cloak and hat away, he walked into the television room for a session of yes, a viewing of the Count of Montecristo turned into fencing practice. Evey loved to see him playing like that and went about her last chores of the day listening to V in full Dantes mode. The television room was obviously too small to contain such whirlwind and eventually V invaded the main hall, blocking, attacking, saying his lines and keeping an eye on a small female body entering a bedroom and coming out of it after a few minutes, carrying a bundle of clothes and sheets in her slim arms.

"Laundry!" His body language screamed. If he had been a cat, his ears would be very stiff and pointing straight up.

Evey kept walking with a placidly domestic expression in her face, keeping her eyes ahead. V missed a couple lines of dialogue but continued brandishing the sword with perhaps a little less grace than usual. The so coveted fairy passed before him on her way to the laundry room and a petite red garment accidentally fell off the bundle of clothes she was carrying.

She cringed at the loud clash of metal hitting the stone floor behind her but acted as if it were the most common thing to expect from men and kept walking. "Careful with that sword, V" She admonished over her shoulder and to his credit, V managed to pick up the slippery weapon, apologize, declare it was late, state that he was going to bed and even wish her a peaceful night, all in one same sentence that could have used a few commas. Sometimes a girl just had to grin.

Evey could almost predict the exact chain of events that would follow but waiting was such a sweet torment that she actually loaded the washing machine, then the dryer and waited for her laundry to be ready. Once she was done, she turned the lights off and headed back to her room, scanning the floor that was now missing the very dirty red panties. She closed her door and went to bed, letting things unfold by themselves.

Behind another closed door, shaky hands pressed a precious trophy to a porcelain face. Unnaturally sharp senses were on overload and a brilliant mind was making plans for the rest of the evening. V didn't care, this time he wasn't giving them back.

Finis.


End file.
